Agonotheta

I'll See You In Hell, Turd!

February 25, 2004

The toilets at my work have the strongest flushes in the Western Hemisphere. I never knew why until today when I overheard the head custodian speaking to the devil in a bathroom stall. Apparently, the school district hired Mephistopheles to power the great flushing system that we have.

I asked the custodian why they went with the Apocalypse Millenium Edition flushing system and he said that after sending out RFP's to Beelzebub and his main competition, the Messiah Armageddon Flushing System, he felt the Apocalypse was the way to go because of the environmental differences. It seems that the Apocalypse not only takes the fecal/urine/tp matter away, but actually sends it directly to the underworld to be used as fuel to light the never-ending flames of Hell.

One downside though, this new system is so powerful that we've even had a few employees go in and never come back. But, I think its just Succubus having some fun with them. Old Lucifer sure can be a kidder.

I am happy for the Prince of Darkness, though, because apparently we have better benefits here at the district than in hell. He says they're going to through tough times and may be claiming bankruptcy soon.